Parasocial Relationships of the Digital Age

On August 19, breakout queer pop star Chappell Roan addressed the harassment she has faced via TikTok, posing the question, “If you saw a random woman on the street… would you harass her in public?” Roan’s TikTok was divisive, sparking a debate; some believed that public figures should be able to set boundaries with their fans, while others asserted that as a celebrity, she is no longer entitled to privacy. 

Anyone who has spent enough time online has likely heard the term “parasocial relationship.” Sociologists Donald Horton and Richard Wohl coined the term “parasocial interaction” in 1956 to describe the one-sided relationship between a viewer and a media persona. The rise of the internet has made the concept of parasocial interaction increasingly prevalent, influencing celebrity culture both online and offline. In her two TikToks, Roan spoke out about the stalking and harassment she has faced since becoming famous. She addressed the parasocial relationships that exist between fans and celebrities and condemned celebrity culture: “I don’t care that this crazy type of behavior comes along with the job, the career field I’ve chosen. It doesn’t make it normal,” Roan said. She clarified that both she and her fans are random people and that she is entitled to her own time. 

In an age where people are more connected to each other than ever before, a disconnect with reality has grown in tandem. Fans can peer into the lives of celebrities on social media and directly communicate with them via comments, but this has directly fostered one-sided interactions. Constant connection to celebrities on social media can create an illusion of intimacy, when in reality, no personal relationship exists; fans can only understand a celebrity through their persona. In Roan’s words, “It’s weird how people think that you know a person just ‘cause you see them online.” The perceived intimacy of these one-sided relationships can be harmful; Roan herself denounced the mindset that fans are entitled to a celebrity’s time and personal life, even if that idea is normalized in today’s culture. 

Roan is not the only celebrity who has been affected by obsessive behavior. In New York City, fans of Taylor Swift crowded outside her recording studio for hours, hoping to catch a glimpse of her as she left. Some chased her car and peered through the tinted windows, while others even followed her home. Many Swifties online criticized this invasive and dangerous behavior. While fans are familiar with Swift and her life, Swift cannot reciprocate the same knowledge of each of her fans. Just because her fans support her does not make their obsessive behavior any less problematic than it is. 

However, parasocial relationships don’t only exist in the Western pop scene; in fact, K-pop is notorious for its obsessive fan bases. Idols appear on variety shows and participate in fan-calls and meet-and-greets. This ability to watch and even talk to idols could explain why parasocial relationships are so common in K-pop. Fans gather at airports to catch idols getting off their flights, even chasing them in attempts to take photos. Obsessive fans even feel entitled to idols’ private lives; the influence of parasocial relationships is so strong that these fans criticize idols for who they choose to date. 

 Roan couldn’t make it more clear: being a celebrity is not an invitation for harassment, and celebrities do not owe it to their fans to give up their privacy. Stalking, harassment, and invasions of privacy have become commonplace in celebrity culture and are regarded as a price that comes with the job. It is easy to dismiss this behavior as unavoidable and thus acceptable, but justifying harassment as a trade-off invites criticism and hate towards artists like Roan who condemn it or set healthy boundaries. 

Like Roan, rapper Doja Cat has also been criticized for speaking out about parasocial relationships. Doja has garnered criticism for changing her music style and appearance, and in an interview with Harper’s Bazaar, she responded, “If someone has never met me in real life, then, subconsciously, I’m not real to them… They think that person belongs to them in some sense.” Her repeated rejection of parasocial fans has earned her a reputation for being “ungrateful.” 

In the digital age, parasocial relationships are bound to persist and develop, disconnecting people from the world around them. As fans, it is important to understand that no matter how well we think we know a celebrity, we only know as much as they choose to share. Understanding this will make it easier for celebrities to establish their boundaries and for fans to accept them. The digital age doesn’t have to mean an age of real-life disconnect.